Upon feeling the distorted scar on my arm , some memories
flash through my mind. Guilt had been haunting me for years and i had been
trying to ignore the guilt that surged through me by keeping myself busy with work.
However having a little conscience in me , i felt a twinge of guilt in me. Looking
at the photo taken together with my best friend 3 years ago , my guilt increased
constantly. The incident happen 3years ago , on 5th of May 2005 when i was
only 18 years old.
On that day , my best friend Dave and I had went to Malaysia to do some job.
We have been hesitating on doing this job however we had no choice but
to do it.This was our last resort as we do not have any solution to raise hundred
thousand of dollar we lost on gambling.This business was recommended by our creditor
and we had no other way but to accept this job. Upon completing this job for them ,
we will be able to clear our debt. Our job was simple as we will just have to smuggle
10 packet of drugs from Malaysia over to Singapore.
When we reached Malaysia by passing through the Woodland's checkpoint , a
dark tanned , strongly built man approached us. He brought us to a factory
and pass us 10 packets of drugs. The moment i held onto the packets of drugs ,
my heart stood still within me , cold sweat break out my brow. " Hey , if we get caught
while passing the custom , we will be in dead meat " i whispered to Dave , putting the
packets of drugs on the table. " It will be alright , just be calm " gasped Dave.
We split the drugs equally and kept it in our bag. On our way to the checkpoint to get into
Singapore , tormenting thoughts kept on disturbing me. Looking at the Smile plaster on Dave's
face brought me no relief. My mind conjured a portrait of me being caught for smuggling drugs
into Singapore , I started to shake with fears.
Upon reaching the checkpoint , " c...can we don't do this??? " I whined while whipping off
the fears of sweat dripping on my forehead. Dave gave a smile and walked into the checkpoint.
A fierce battle raged within me as I debated whether to throw the bag of drugs before I been
arrested by the policemen in the checkpoint.My obsessive fear repeatedly urged me to dump
the drugs away while the going was good. I was too petrified and could not gain any courage
to strode into the checkpoint , so I threw the drugs away. For a moment my courage was
restored.
However , my fortitude soon melted away when I saw policemen walked pass me. I quickly walked into the
checkpoint. To my horror , i saw Dave been handcuffed and was arrested by the policemen. I was so
petrified that , i just walked away and went back to Singapore. On that night , i was crying badly
as I had lose my best friend. " Why...Why on earth did I leave my best friend in lurch" I sobbed
while slashing my left arm.I blamed myself for leaving him in lurch. For that moment , I knew my best friend
will be gone forever...