What makes a hero? What makes them stand out from the rest? Well, according to Dictionary.com, a hero is said to be a man of distinguished courage or ability, admired for his brave deeds and noble qualities. It could also be a person who, in the opinion of others has heroic qualities or has performed a heroic act and is regarded as a model or ideal.
There may be quite a few variations on the meaning of 'hero' but the one person that has impacted my life strongly though her sheer courage and love is none other than my mother. Many will agree that a mother's love can inspire us, motivate us, comfort us and do much much more. But what this one special woman has done for my sibling and I was to me, nothing short of a hero in my eyes.
My happy family was shattered about a year ago, with the revelation that my father was keeping a mistress. Sure my mother, my sister and I were dealt with a heavy blow. I remember the night when my mother broke the news to me, I was relatively happy before that as I had just returned from a concert. Upon hearing what had happened, tears just flowed out and released what seemed like half of Niagara Falls. I cried out of pity, sadness, anger, frustration and anxiety. There was just too much emotion going on and I could do nothing to contain any of it. From then on, I do not deny that I had hatred for my father. For betraying my mother and for doing this to us. I gave him the cold shoulder for weeks (something that I can pull off quite nicely, I must say).
The aftermath of the revelation was followed by calm talks that sometimes escalated into snarling threats made the father. I know this because I heard them when listening at the door. He said he'd turn over a new leaf. Well, I guess that’s what they all say. Sadly that was not the case. My mother found evidence of his scandalous activities. That was the last straw. They were headed for a divorce. There was no doubt. After realising that we would never accept him back, he turned nasty, at least towards my mother, from what I was told. Luckily, my mother is not someone to be trifled with. She stood her ground and fought for what she wanted and needed to support herself and the family behind her. After settling the divorce papers, alimony and maintenance fees, it was roughly the start of the year 2008.
Next was the problem of finding a new home as the money from the sale of my present one would be split amongst the both of them. It was a waiting game. Waiting for people to come and see the house, make and offer and finally purchase it. Plus, we were also seeing other properties to decide which had the potential to become our next home. During this period of time, my mother never ceased to amaze me on how well she could cope with such new situations. She had learnt how to pay the household bills and other little things that used to be done by my father. She had also learnt a thing or two about property! Although these may seem trivial to some, but the amount of time she spent moping about on the impact of the revelation as compared to the time she spent trying to move on and actually getting about it, is seemingly minimal.
I shall end here as there is little left to say. Why. Some people might ask. Why bring to light something that has hurt me so bad. Why? You might say it’s part of the healing process, to bring to light that some families do have a rather happy ever after even after divorce.( I sure am happier now.) But my most important reason why, is to bring tell all the extent of a mother’s love for her children. It may not be the most extreme scenario of a mother’s love, but it is my version of it. Straight from my perspective, my life.
This woman, my mother, selflessly protected us from wind and rain, to give my sibling and me a better life even after being dealt with such a heavy blow. She continued to be my pillar of love and support throughout these troubled times. If she isn’t a hero, then what I wouldn’t know what is.