MyStory :: Close Encounters of the Nice Kind :: Close @ Tiong Bahru 2

Mandeep Singh, 31
An ophthalmologist who was born in Kuala Lumpur, the Singapore Permanent Resident won a scholarship to study here when he was just 14. He left recently, on another Singapore government scheme, to pursue his doctoral degree in Oxford.

Margaret Chung, 52
A graphic designer and good friend to many young residents in Tiong Bahru estate.


The first time Mandeep Singh saw Margaret Chung two years ago, he made a mental note reminding himself to befriend her.

"We were at a residents' meeting," recalled the 31-year-old ophthalmologist, "and I was wondering who that woman with the big hair was."

But it wasn't just her funky hairstyle that he was fascinated with. Mandeep was impressed with the way she conducted herself and how she spoke with clarity and passion.

So he went up, introduced himself, and it turned out the 52-year-old graphic designer had also wanted to meet him.

Although it has only been about one-and-half years, the two residents in Tiong Bahru, who live a few streets away from each other, have become very close buddies.

"I get to know people very easily but before meeting Margaret," Mandeep said, "I didn't think it was possible to make such good friends at my age."

Margaret agreed with him to a certain extent and added, "It's not difficult to make new friends, but maintaining a relationship takes effort."

She added, "We often hear people saying ‘we must meet, we must catch up' but action does not follow suit."

For Mandeep, having left his hometown, Kuala Lumpur, since he was a kid, friends and neighbors are even more important.

Somehow, the young doctor is always sure and clear about what he wants in life.

Even when he was just 13, he knew he wanted to go to Singapore.

One day, in a casual conversation, a senior who had gone to school in Singapore, convinced him that he should also follow her footsteps.

On an ASEAN Scholarship, he enrolled at Victoria School, and began a new chapter in his life.

"Coming to Singapore in 1991, I made good friends almost immediately. Blending in here was easy for me. The kids at my school were from many different nationalities and cultural backgrounds, so that made the environment a real vibrant melting pot. It was great fun indeed, and we all got along very well. Everyone learnt from one another and it's wonderful that we are friends to this day."

Before long, he was in Victoria Junior College, and then, medical school.

Now an ophthalmologist in a big public hospital, he recently received another Singapore Government scholarship to pursue his PhD in eye surgery at the University of Oxford, UK, where he will further his research in cures for eye diseases.

A Singapore Permanent Resident since 2008, Mandeep considers Singapore as his home and has every plan to return after completing his doctoral studies at Oxford.

"I feel that by being in Singapore, so many opportunities have opened up for me - educational, personal and professional opportunities. I don't think my life would be the same if I had not come here. I've gained immensely from growing up here."

Among other things, he also appreciates the multiculturalism he is exposed to, and the close friends he made here, in particular, a "big mama" like Margaret.

"A good neighbor makes a place feels like home," he said.

Margaret is certainly one such neighbor.

"Going away, I had a lot of paperwork to deal with and Margaret knew that."

He added, "One day, she just volunteered her time and energy to help with my papers. You know, these are very intimate chores that I don't feel comfortable leaving to just anyone. But I trust Margaret."

In Mandeep's opinion, "Margaret is like a mom to us and she brings people together."

"I will miss her," he added. "I will miss the late-night conversations we had at my balcony. Obviously, she has been through a lot more in life and I think she has a lot of wisdom to share. So I know she is someone I can turn to for anything. I will miss having her around but I also know that if I really need someone to listen to me, she's just a phone call away."

In her self-deprecating way, Margaret dismissed her roles in the Tiong Bahru family.

While others have described as "a super-connector, who is there for the young people, and someone who brings people together", she begged to differ.

To her, being friendly and helpful is just part of her nature, and at most, a calling.

She can't understand why more people can't be more civil or helpful to each other.

Perhaps, more people need to be reminded about the benefits of having great neighbours.

Margaret said, "It's terribly important to have good neighbours."

"This family is a very good example. The current result of Tiong Bahru estate is a very good example of good neighbours who care for each other, and share and have a common goal."

"Like a family," she added.

"Mandeep and the rest of the Tiong Bahru family are close to my heart."

A Sikh by birth, Mandeep is proud that he has close buddies from different cultural backgrounds and he believes the secret to maintaining close friendships in a multicultural environment lies in "being alert to the differences, but having great empathy in the areas of common ground."

"Tolerance is just the beginning," he added. "We need to know how to celebrate and fully embrace other cultures."

And to Margaret, "The secret to breaking the ice lies in sincerity."

Multiculturalism is manifested in different forms and some more obvious than others.

For Mandeep, "It's like me eating ‘la mien' and ‘chwee kuay' and sipping ‘tau huay chwee'. Also I can speak Chinese and some dialect. It really does help to break the ice instantly."

And these become even more important as he prepared to leave for his studies in Oxford.

"I'm going to miss the food here. But most of all, I will miss the company of my buddies."

Then turning to Margaret and a few close friends who had come to say goodbye, he asked rhetorically, "You guys will visit me regularly right?"

Recently, when talking to his friends about the future, he was forced to think about his retirement plan.

"I would like the place of my youth to figure prominently in the later part of my life."

No prize for guessing where that might be.